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Post Info TOPIC: Classic post - rather clever


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Classic post - rather clever


7522. This is how the CC is viewed here part 1
by BillRT, 12/9/05 13:40 ET
Abbott: Well, Costello, I'm going to Rockaway with you. Rev Ireland the owner of Christ Church gave me a job as the sales and marketing guy for as long as you're on the team.
Costello: Look Abbott, if you're the sales and marketing guy you must know all the players.

Abbott: I certainly do.

Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.

Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these gear heads now-a-days very peculiar names.

Costello: You mean funny names?

Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Greasy Doty

Costello: His brother DaffyDoty.

Costello: And their French cousin.

Abbott: French? FTF!!!!!

Costello: Goofe'

Abbott: Goofe' Doty. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who (Rev Ireland) is on first, What's (Ted Doty) on second, I Don't Know (Christ Church) is on third...

Costello: That's what I want to find out.

Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.

Costello: Are you the manager?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: You gonna be the coach too?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names.

Abbott: Well I should.

Costello: Well then, you know who the owner is?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: I mean the fellow's name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The owner of Christ Church.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The owner.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy taking everyone's money...

Abbott: Who is!

Costello: I'm asking you who's got the money.

Abbott: That's the man's name.

Costello: That's who's name?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's who?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Costello: Look, you got an owner of Christ Church?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: Who owns Christ Church?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: When you make a donation, who gets the money?

Abbott: Every dollar of it.

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the owner of Christ Churchs name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy that gets...

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Who gets the money...

Abbott: He does, every dollar of it. Sometimes his wife comes down and collects it.

Costello: Who's wife?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Abbott: What's wrong with that?

Costello: I wanna know is when you sign up to build a new mega church in Rockaway Township, how does he sign his name?

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: How does he sign...

Abbott: That's how he signs it.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Yes. PAUSE

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guys name who owns Christ Church.

Abbott: No. What is providing the pr attack.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's doing the PR attack.

Abbott: Who's owns the company.

Costello: One lie at a time!

Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.

Costello: I'm not changing nobody!

Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.

Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy that owns Christ Church?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: OK.

Abbott: Alright. PAUSE

Costello: What's the guy's name that owns Christ Church?

Abbott: No. What is taking care of the bad PR.

Costello: I'm not asking you who’s taking care of the bad PR.

Abbott: Who owns the company.

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's the Rev in Montclair, we're not talking about him.

Costello: Now how did I get to Montclair?

Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.

Costello: If I mentioned the Reverands name, who did I say managing day to day operations?

Abbott: No. Who owns the company.

Costello: What 's his name?

Abbott: What builds take care of the bad PR!

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's the General Manager.

Costello: There I go, back to the general manager again! PAUSE

Costello: Would you just stay in Montclair and don't go off it.

Abbott: Alright, what do you want to know?

Costello: Now who's running the Church?

Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who in the Church?

Costello: What am I putting in the Church.

Abbott: No. What is in charge of the bad PR.

Costello: You don't want who in charge of the bad PR?

Abbott: Who owns the Church.

7522.1. part 2
by BillRT, 12/9/05 13:40 ET
Re: This is how the CC is viewed here part 1 by BillRT, 12/9/05
Costello: I don't know. Together: He's the General Manager! PAUSE
Costello: Enough about Christ Church, you got reps from Montclair involved?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The Legal Counsel's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.

Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.

Costello: Then tell me who's playing legal eagle for the state.

Abbott: Who owns the Church.

Costello: I'm not...stay out of Church ownership!!! I want to know what's the guy's name acting as counsel?

Abbott: No, What is in charge of the bad PR.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's in charge of the bad PR.

Abbott: Who owns the church

Costello: I don't know. Together: He's the General Manager! PAUSE

Costello: The legal counsel's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: Because!

Abbott: Oh, he's the governor of New Jersey PAUSE

Costello: Look, You got someone from the governor’s office on this team?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The guy’s name?

Abbott: Tomorrow.

Costello: You don't want to tell me today?

Abbott: I'm telling you now.

Costello: Then go ahead.

Abbott: Tomorrow!

Costello: What time?

Abbott: What time what?

Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's acting in the governor’s best interest?

Abbott: Now listen. Who is not governing.

Costello: I'll break you're arm if you say who owns the company!!! I want to know what's the governor’s name?

Abbott: What's in charge of the bad PR.

Costello: I don't know. Together: The general manager! PAUSE

Costello: Gotta a Montclair company?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: The company’s name?

Abbott: Today.

Costello: Today, and tomorrow's the governor.

Abbott: Now you've got it.

Costello: All we got is a couple of losers on the team. PAUSE

Costello: You know I'm a player too.

Abbott: So they tell me.

Costello: What gets behind building the church in Rockaway Township and does some fancy talking, Tomorrow's talking like the governor and a bunch of guys with money want to bully the residents of Rockaway. Now the big money guys are telling me they will buy votes if I can give them a firm delivery date. When they start writing checks, me, being a good salesman like the Rev Ireland, I'm gonna promise the guy whatever he wants. So I pick up his check and cash it as fast as my fat, greasy feet will carry me to the bank and I give the money to who?

Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.

Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about! PAUSE

Abbott: That's all you have to do.

Costello: Is to give the money to who.

Abbott: Yes!

Costello: Now who's got it?

Abbott: Naturally. PAUSE

Costello: Look, if I give the deposits for the builder, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Naturally?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: So I get the checks from the guys and give them to Naturally.

Abbott: No you don't give the checks to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's different.

Costello: That's what I said.

Abbott: you're not saying it...

Costello: I give the deposits to Naturally.

Abbott: You give them to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's what I said!

Abbott: You ask me.

Costello: I give the hard earned dollars to who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Now you ask me.

Abbott: You give the money to Who?

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU!!! I give the checks to who. Whomever gave me a check, forgets about it for 6 months and no one asks where their money was spent on. Who picks up the checks and cashes in an offshore account and tells What. What lets I Don't Know know the money is deposited. I Don't Know tells the governor’s guy, Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and write another check and gives it to Because. Why? I don't know! He's with the Governor and I don't give a darn!

Abbott: What?

Costello: I said I don't give a darn!

Abbott: Oh, that's the guy that’s suing Christ Church for falsifying documents.

Costello: (makes screaming sound)



-- Edited by RTconcern at 15:06, 2005-12-09

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Ok, so with the snow falling this morning, I had a little bit too much free time on my hands

MrBill

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